Newnan’s Largest Lessener 14

Two weeks to go in the contest.

So falling off the band wagon today.  I’m working my way through a dozen donuts and I’m really going to stop off for those new Wendy’s premier side dishes on the way home tonight.

After killing myself today, I am jumping into two a days for the final push to weigh in at the end of the month.

If you never played football you might not be familiar with the concept of two a days.  In the middle of summer, the very hottest months, practice would start for the fall football season.  Instead of starting practice at noon and going for four or five hours in the middle of the day, we would wake up early and practice from eight in the morning to ten and then come back and practice from four to six that evening.  In theory it kept us from getting heat exhaustion and sun stroke and a million other problems.  Mostly I think the fat coaches just sweat too much and burned their bald heads in the noon sun.

This was back in the 1970s when dehydration didn’t exist and concussions were funny not life-threatening.  Ahh, the good old days.

So starting tomorrow and running through the end of May I am waking up at 5:30am and walking.  A half hour to forty five minutes of activity every morning to start the day off right, and by right I mean painfully with much perspiration.

Then afternoons, after work or before WoW raids on weekends, I’ll do the exercise bike or elliptical or the Pilates.  Every day, for just fourteen or so day, I will be doing this and damn it if it works because then even after this contest I’ll have to admit what I already know is true.  Exercise does work.

Still even without it…

Now the numbers:

	2/9/2012	5/4/2012	5/11/2012	LW	AdvoVar
Neck		17.25	17.25	-
Left Arm	16.50	15.50	15.25	(0.25)	(1.25)
Shoulders	58.50	53.00	53.50	0.50	(5.00)
Chest	56.75	52.00	52.00	-	(4.75)
Waist	55.00	48.50	47.50	(1.00)	(7.50)
Hips	49.00	45.00	44.50	(0.50)	(4.50)
Left Thigh	28.50	24.50	23.00	(1.50)	(5.50)
Left Calf	18.50	17.50	18.00	0.50	(0.50)
Left Ankle	10.50	10.00	10.00	-	(0.50)
Left Wrist	7.75	7.50	7.50	-	(0.25)
BP	159/104	129/83	139/82
Pulse	70.00	79.00	73.00	-	(5.00)
Weight	319.20	277.60	276.00	(1.60)	(43.20)
Contest	330.00			16.36%	(54.00)

So confusing, now that I look at the numbers.  I lost 1.6 lb. this week, this is in the LW column where the numbers from this week are compared to the previous week.

The AdvoVar is the column that compares this week to the starting numbers when I began taking the Advocare products and following their diet plan (see last week’s blog for the meal plan basic).

Finally the last row on the chart is the contest information, the starting weight was taken a day and a half before I started the Advocare, then in what happens to be the AdvoVar column is the total weight lost in the contest (in black) and the percentage lost is in the Box with the starting weight.  Now that I look at it I’ll just put the whole contest information in the Box next week.

The Exercise Routine:

Shut up.  I swear, this is the last week for this comment.  Next week it’s all blood, sweat and tears – probably in the reverse order based on amounts excreted.

Diary of a Fat Kid

Mother’s Day is a pain in the ass.

I think I take after my mother more than I want to admit. 

As I recall Mother’s Day growing up involved Mom sleeping in while Dad made breakfast (my brother and I helping where we could, but it was Swedish pancakes and little kids are no good at that).  Then we’d give her something we made, or Dad bought, and then we’d all have to shower and dress and drive to Minneapolis to visit Dad’s mother and go out to an early dinner.

I don’t think my Mom ever minded that Mother’s day never seemed to revolve around her.  I think she prized the extra sleep time.

Even now it seems strange to make a big deal out of Mother’s day.  If you ever ask her what she wants my mother says, “nothing.”  So I send her flowers at work so her co-workers know she has kids (or at least at one time had children who know where she works).  This year she actually asked for something!  Now it was the “Twilight” movies on DVD, so I am not sure it was her or a thirteen year old hacked her e-mail account.

So even if I give her crap for all the bad eating habits I have these days, if it wasn’t for my Mom I’d probably be living in a gutter. (like my brother)  I developed great study habits and a healthy appreciation for steady employment from my Mom.  I learned to cook and do laundry and at least theoretically clean a bathroom and kitchen because she insisted I and my brother need to know how to take care of ourselves.

I think she did a pretty good job.  Just don’t tell her.

The Plan:

Two a days, following the meal plan, maintaining a positive attitude.  Mostly just not dying before the contest ends.

After that, who knows?

Later.